• DearAmbitiousGirl

Can You Trust Your Inner Circle?

Lesson of the Week: Always Check Your Inner Circle !

Last week's episode of Love & Hip Hop really got me thinking. If you watched it too, Im sure you will be familiar with what I am going to say. A cast member named Sierra, had an assistant named Moriah, who was having an affair with her husband, Shooter. Sierra was so devastated because she thought her assistant was loyal to her and down with her business and she obviously never expected that type of behavior from her husband. Needless to say, that situation really had me thinking and reevaluating my life and the relationships I have with the people who are in it.

Throughout the duration of life, there will be hundreds of people we will come into contact with. Some may stick around for a while and some may only be there temporarily. With that being said, there are always circumstances that can lead your circle to change. You have a falling out with your bestfriend, someone goes away to school and you guys lose contact with each other. You never know, one day you can think you’re so close to somebody and then the next day he or she could be your worst enemy.

This is why it is critical for you to ALWAYS check your inner circle. You need to be aware of who is in it and how those people tend to move. For example, if you’ve ever told someone a secret and it somehow managed to get out, you now know that “friend” you told may not be as loyal as they claim. Ask yourself… "Can I really trust these people to be those “ride or die” type of friends?" There shouldn’t be anyone in your inner circle that you’re only “cool” with. If I just met you and we start to form some type of bond of course we can be cool. But, don't just go placing them in your inner circle just yet. Get to know them a little more. Not to say that length of friendship means the most because your oldest friend could stab you in the back. Being smart about who you bring in and choose to share your life with will save you much drama and stress in the long run.

Your inner circle should be a thought of as a mental sanctuary where you don’t have to worry about who knows who’s business or who doesn’t like this one. If this happens to be the case, you should consider making subgroups within that circle if you need to, because when people don’t like each other things become very messy. Make sure that the people you keep around you are for you, meaning you all are there out of love for each other. There shouldn’t be any going behind people’s backs or shadiness happening. This is when you will have to check that circle. Don’t be afraid to ask questions. If someone is really your friend/ ace boon coon, you should be able to talk to them about how you feel and be able to tell when they’re lying or when something is off.

The same applies to your relationships as well. Ladies, as we get older and start to get in more serious relationships and have husbands, this doesn’t mean that we can necessarily always trust them 100%. It’s nice to think you we can but life happens. You never want to be the one caught in a heartbreaking situation because you didn’t pay attention to the signs he was showing you all along. Let’s face it; our men are parts of our inner circles as well so we must check them as such. He starts coming home later, check him about it. If he starts stuttering when he gives you answers or becomes defensive immediately…. Something. Aint. Right. Sometimes when it comes to love and family it might be easier to ignore obvious signs rather than deal with them but that will only end up hurting you.

The point of this post is to remind you to always watch who you keep around you and let in your personal life because the closest ones to you may be the same ones plotting on your downfall.